self-awareness

As to the art of creation, it’s not a mystery…it’s all that we do.  It is mysterious to us how we create some of the things in our lives that seemingly hit us from our blind spot though.  It’s in the mystery of it that we can’t see how it happened and thus we find ourselves getting lead down the path of “what we don’t understand, we fear”…or are victim to.   We don’t understand so we then easily blame “outside events” for awful things happening in our lives. 

That view is one of a sleepy head, eyes closed in a past dream of how we thought life worked and what we’ve been told was real.  Waking up, we see that there was never anyone or anything to blame and we laugh at ourselves for thinking otherwise.  Waking up, we see that we are creating everything we are able and unable to sense with every single breath that we take.  There is no separation from what exists on the inside of us and what we experience in our lives.

To unravel the mystery of how and why we create, it is at one point necessary to understand our core beliefs and how they play into everything that we experience.  It is akin to reverse-engineering the creation process or in other words, taking the “effect”, or the result and tracing back what happened to “cause” the result. » Read more

It has been a very active week of energetic cleansings taking place in all forms and on every level of our beings.  So deep and so true are the essences of this that one can be left feeling exhausted and not quite sure what has happened.  Thus if you’re feeling drained or “fried” there is a good reason for it.

As time continues to accelerate, all issues within the self that hold on to the old ways and old limits of love, communication and interaction with the self are popping out to the surface faster and faster.  I don’t even think that there is a place where one could bury their head deep enough in the sand to not somehow be affected by our inner call for freedom. 

This means that if there is fear residing in you or a belief that you are less than you are, then your environment will show it to you over and over again in different ways and at a faster rate so that you can simply see it and purge it.   If it (they) are held on to past this point they begin to fester and cause undue pain and that never does anyone any good.  So it’s time to really let go. » Read more

How many people do you know of who have been told that they were addicted to something, had to stop doing it, and should then stay away from it because they’d be considered an addict to it for the rest of their lives?

These people have been led to believe that they one, have made a mistake, two must change because they are bad and three, are told to remain solidly in that situation until they pass from this life.  What? 

Don’t get me wrong, there is a tremendous accomplishment of value in becoming aware of a self-destructive behavior and having the courage and self-will to change that behavior in a sustained way.   But we must evolve as human beings through these changes in order for them to catapult us forward as they're designed to do.  This is our natural way, so that we may evolve beyond the self-destructive behavior. » Read more

Even though there are overall underlying similarities to each person’s journey toward self-awakening, the path is very much an individual one.   In other words, we as humanity are all present at this time in history on this planet and so we are all evolving.  How and to what extent each of us evolves however, is completely up to us and our own willingness to let go of the old, lower and limiting beliefs and allow the new and higher aspects of us to integrate and be utilized.

If we, for example, release a limiting belief about ourselves, there will be a space created within us that is energetically clear where that old belief used to exist.   It will be there and await our own, true input that comes as a result of the release of a past false belief and will fill it in a new way.  If, however, that space isn’t actively utilized in a new way by us it will simply refill itself once again and out of habit with the old ways.

Say you have a limiting and false belief telling you that you’re not worthy enough to receive your heart’s deepest desires.   (And I say your “heart’s” deepest desires because our mind’s desires are often far too limited and stuck in the ego.)   Maybe one of your heart’s deepest desires is for true inner peace. ..a peace that is unshakable and prevails through any storm, physical, emotional or environmental regardless of its intensity. » Read more

To truly understand the gift of magic we have inside of us called “love”, we have had to experience it in all of its fascinating and complicated interpretations.  In doing this, however, what we have found over these long lifetimes of study is that it’s not very complicated at all.   It’s not complicated now because we can finally make a comparison and understand.  There are two kinds of love.  One that is on its way out and one that is on its way in.

The one that is on its way out, funny…is the one that is based outside of you.  Yes, it is leaving.  It is the one that says you’ve needed love.  That is not true and pretty important to see.  We’ve been taught to believe that we needed love because we couldn’t remember that “love” is what we have always been made of.  We knew it was important to us somehow, but since we didn’t know how to find it inside or even how to look inside, we’ve been searching for it out there.

Through religion, relationships, martyrdom and control we have very mistakenly thought there was something out there that was needed in order to fill that need for love…self-worth…approval.  But in keeping the focus on this need to “fill”, what has happened is it has also kept each person looking outside of themselves and deeply away from the exploration of self to locate where Love is actually found. » Read more

Isn’t it funny how we want to blame someone or something if things don’t go the way we anticipated or hoped for?  When our expectations aren’t met, what’s the first thing we do?  We look for a culprit in our environment.  Why?  Because we have been taught to live in, and respond and react to this outside environment called our world.  We have learned to trust what the outside is telling us more than what is taking place on the inside.

The outside of us is one big giant mirror in the form of people, places and things that reflect back to us exactly what we believe whether conscious of those beliefs or not.  What we hold inside, we have been holding in order to bring those people, places and things to us to get us here to this place.  And now, this lifetime is the culmination of those experiences which we are seeing through our beliefs.  

For example, if someone you care for were to walk up to you and say something like, “You’re stupid” or basically, “You’re not worthy”, it would probably hurt your feelings or cause you to mount a strike back in the defense of your worth.  In this however, you will be believing in something outside of yourself and making yourself a victim to your environment.  You will not at all be seeing what you’re really showing yourself. » Read more

In this process of conscious enlightenment and energetic attunement, you will naturally and systematically be releasing all of the held patterns and beliefs that have kept you in any type of bondage or karmic cycles.  If you choose, this is the lifetime for that to take place. 

Sometimes, letting go of that “old” self and of what is no longer necessary can happen without a struggle or resistance.  For example, say that there is a gradual change that takes place in your diet in order to naturally lighten you up.  It happens because you simply begin desiring different foods, thereby naturally letting go of denser ones.  The denser energies naturally become replaced by lighter ones that will now better serve your rising consciousness and vibration of your body.

Often, however, there will be resistance to letting go.  We are after all, logical and skeptical beings.  The mind will come in and ask why we are letting go of things and people that we thought were important to our lives and identities. It will ask…sometimes yell, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”  The mind doesn’t know how to trust what it doesn’t understand.  It wonders, “Can I trust that if I let go of this important thing/person that the new will come in, be better and serve me more appropriately than the old?” » Read more

Over the past 3 days a large portion of the pretty little rug that made up my old world and (what I thought were) priorities, was swept clean out from under me.  Now as I sit here taking an in-breath and stock of all that has occurred, I can say with certainty, that it has been painful.  But also, and most importantly, I can also say that just past the shock of sudden change is an inconspicuous place…a room that is soft, gentle, clear and filled with the kindness of a loving kiss upon my cheek.

I’ll explain this later, but for now, let’s go back to the cave.  I returned there several times over a couple of day’s time.  I’d close my eyes and be in it, each time starting off in darkness and having to gently guide myself to the allowance of my own light inside. 

The scuffling noises that I’d heard, of course, showed up again and gave me an insight that is still playing over and over again like a mini movie in my head.  There inside this cave and to my left, were about 10 people, crouched down low and holding on to one another’s shoulders, all slowly moving in the same direction in the cave together.  The majority didn’t have flashlights themselves, so were huddled up close to each other with one gentleman who was out in front with a flashlight leading the way, but still crouched down like the rest.  » Read more

My goodness have we ever been taught to be afraid of the dark!  So representative of that which is intellectually unknown to us.  So mired in the polarized struggle between good and evil.  So present in our lives but yet completely invisible to us because we have existed in it and understood no other way.

It appears that I sat in the dark for so many months with the candle perfectly placed by me in order to progressively witness the lack of boogiemen I had once feared would come out of the corners and do something scary.  I had a new level of security, and with it also came a sense of exploration that I would look into this cave that I had been “stuck” in (or, placed myself in).  I started feeling around once again and walking with trust assuming that there would be a new brighter light somewhere…maybe down a tunnel…I just had to venture out and find it.

Funny, how the tools I use on a daily basis to regain and remain in balance had gotten pirated by my little cave dweller…while taking careful steps in the darkness I became aware of shuffling noises around me and I obviously couldn’t see anything (wished for night vision goggles…but no…).  This immediately brought back the feeling of wanting to get up against a wall for safety, find a candle and see what the noise was and thus what I had to accept and love…I thought… » Read more

This particular blog is most likely going to take about 3 separate entries because I want to share an experience that needs a little extra room.  I have, up to this point, kept many of these deeper experiences to myself because of their personal nature and also because it’s often difficult to get a logical grasp on their meaning…and then relate that meaning to what is taking place either in my life or anything beyond it.

My meditations come in many different forms, and I’ve learned that meditation is NOT a tool I that I’d want to ever keep in a box, per se, and be limited in the wheres, the whens and the hows of it.  If I’ve had a long day and am frazzled from the inside out, the goal is clear…find quiet space, close the eyes, stop the mind, feel the breath…ah…the moment…and relax…begin anew from here.  If I’m in a painful place (physically or emotionally), the goal is to step aside from the pain and observe myself breathing it fully into my body to clearly see and acknowledge it, eyes open or closed and wherever I happen to be at the time. 

Then there are meditations that take me on long journeys into different worlds where I exist away from this body and experience.  It is as if my true home and being live there and I, through meditation, get to go visit the true me and watch myself evolve from this perspective as an observer. » Read more